Peter
If you can’t stop fighting
If the arguments, bickering, and conflict are never-ending with your partner, then it might be a good idea to take a break.
When arguments continue to fester, the unbearable tension it causes won’t be good for you or your partner’s emotional health.
An official break up might also occur after a big argument. That’s never a good way to end things.
Your relationship simply isn’t a priority
Healthy relationships take a lot of effort. You need to make time for each other and be there for one another.
This doesn’t mean you have to be 24/7 all about your relationship. Not at all. We all have careers and hobbies.
But if you can’t give the relationship the time it needs to grow, and your career and passions are taking precedence every single time over your relationship, then taking a break can help you get your life in order.
According to dating coach Ravid Yosef, “It takes work to keep the romance alive and the couple has to make a conscious decision to put this work in.”
You fear that you’re missing out on other areas of your life
‘‘The uneasy and sometimes all-consuming feeling that you’re missing out – that your peers are doing, in the know about, or in possession of more or something better than you’.”
If you’re in your 20s or 30s and you fear that you’re not really experiencing the full spectrum of life, then it might be time to ask yourself whether you need a break from your partner.
Perhaps you’d like to trial dating new people. Or you just want to be free to explore the world. Whatever it is, you’re not going to be young for too much longer.
And you don’t want to have regrets when you decide to start a family and settle down.
But of course, you don’t want to make this decision lightly. It could be worth it to talk with your partner about how you feel you’re missing out on other areas of life. There might be a way for you to work through it so you can both experience new things together.
But if you feel a break from each other is the only way to discover different areas of life, then communicate clearly your expectations of what this entails for you and your partner.
Why should you take a break?
Per Birch: “A successful relationship break allows you to do a couple things. First and foremost, you can focus on the problem at hand without feeling the constant burden of a disappointed partner. (Some easily overwhelmed people feel crippled to handle their ‘life stuff’ when they feel they are constantly letting down the person they love.) Secondly, you’ll find out how much you really miss your significant other. If it’s been weeks, and you don’t miss them at all, or you’re more productive and happier without them, maybe it’s time to break up. On the flip side, if your partner’s absence suddenly makes you see all the ways they improve your life, you can return to the relationship with a renewed commitment to communicate, show your partner love and work toward balancing the partnership with all other obligations.” In essence, it helps you gain perspective.
